You know, Lucy, from Peanuts with her sign that says "The Doctor Is In" and her canister where she collects nickles for doling out mental health advice.
I've been thinking for many months now, that I have to find a way to deal with my son's absolute distaste for all things change-related. He does not like change, he likes predictability and routine. Gosh, I think to myself and sigh, where does he get that from? Except I don't actually use the word gosh in my head.
No really, I think that all time, it's surely not from me.
Reality check.
Exhibit A: I can't even blog on this blog because it's not my old blog and I don't like blogging on my new blog even though the act of blogging, really hasn't changed.
Exhibit B: The thought of going out for an evening and leaving my children with a babysitter puts me at total unease.
Exhibit C: The thought of taking a vacation, a real vacation with my kids that involves an airplane, practically makes me break out in hives.
It's so hard for me to see this because I wasn't always like this. Looking back, I can see it clearly. It all changed when I became a mom.
I thought I had this beaten. I have TWO children now, not one. I feel like a Mother now, with a capital *M*, not a trying-to-be-one or a I'll bet I look like one on the outside model.
But still, plainly, somewhere in me lurks this fear that something will go wrong if things deviate off-course. Wrong how? I don't know.
How does one become more fearless? Really, I want to know.